Thinking about it now it doesn't feel like it was me doing it. But that's something else entirely. Basically, since it started, I think James felt like Andrew was taking his place a bit as the best friend, when it was actually something quite different. Now that the truth has come out and I can be honest with James, I feel a lot better. He is a great friend to me. He has got me through this year, I am 100% certain that I would have dropped out had I not had him.
He just came here to do a bit of revision for Mathematical Modelling and then we popped into Portswood for a coffee. And I paid for a regular and was given a large so... can't complain. =)
I also got a long awaited call from the University Counselling service today, who have given me 3 sessions. I'm so glad. I saw them in January I think it was, and since then have been on the waiting list. Granted, I think that my need is less urgent now than it was then, but I still would like to talk to them. Maybe next year I can sort something so I go to see them once a month, or every 2 months. Not too often, but it will be nice to have that extra support.
Don't get me wrong, it makes me very uncomfortable, but from experience, it does really help me. Just because I don't feel I can tell some things to people I care about, because I don't want to hurt or upset them.
So yes, not particularly interesting, but possibly worth documenting. In other news, Facebook has locked me out which is partly a good thing since I will be forced to revise, but it also means I can't ask people for help on Facebook. =(
Counselling always helps some people. Some disregard it though, good that it helps you. And wow, you study Maths at Uni? That must be something! If only I could be smart enough to study at a university level!
ReplyDeleteGuess Tyler's your boyfriend? I'm sure he's oblvious to whatever's going on. Don't you worry. Having a crush on someone is okay. I've had crushes on people when taken. :P
I like your blogs. They're really nicely done! :)
I am apparently clever to have got onto this course but now I'm here, I'm finding it so difficult! Lol, makes me feel pretty thick unfortunately. =(
ReplyDeleteYeah, Tyler is my boyfriend, we've been together 2 years but that whole time has been very difficult with so much going on, his dad was sick and stuff and then me moving away to Uni made everything so hard. Tyler unfortunately found out that I had acted on feelings for Andrew, before I had the chance to tell him myself. I wish I had told him myself. =(
And thank you. =) My life is so messed up, I'm trying to order it a bit. =P x
Oh no. He found out? Harsh. You must of been really angry. Guessing someone told him. Can't trust people can you? :/
ReplyDeleteEveryone's life is messed up these days, I don't know a single normal person! :P
"Everyone's life is messed up these days, I don't know a single normal person! :P"
ReplyDeleteI guess you said it lightly, but there is SO much truth in this! Everyone's got stuff going on on some level and it's a very good reason to be nice to everyone, no matter what.
To the girl writing this blog - I refuse to call you Fat Bitch - why such a negative name? This blog looks like it's supposed to be encouraging self-love, but your username totally defies that. You're beautiful - don't label yourself with ugly words x
He actually logged into my Blogger and read a private blog. He's done that before. =/ I'm actually changing my passwords on things because it's not fair that he can log into all my stuff and read all my conversations and stuff. =/
ReplyDeleteHe's more angry at the other guy, but it is as much my fault as his. =( x
I'm sorry for the name. It just kind of stuck. My dailybooth is FatBitch and my youtube is FatBitchMusic. I think it just stuck because people remember it and I used to be called it by bullies, I think using it myself was a way of just accepting it myself. It doesn't hurt me anymore, it's just words. If I can love myself as a FatBitch, then I can still love myself if I realise I'm not. Does that sound weird? x
ReplyDeleteWhat an ass! That stuffs pretty private. I write private blogs myself. Pretty damn nosey of him. Do it back to him! See how he likes it! I joke, you'll be no better than him.
ReplyDeleteShouldn't you be revising anyway? Like you said your facebooks down so it must be a sign from the Mathematical gods! :P
I'm glad you are able to love yourself under that name, but it remains that it's a lie over you and I can't help thinking the more it's used the more you're going to accept it and believe it. Why SHOULD you have to accept it? It's not true!!! x
ReplyDeleteWhat Just Me said. Using a name like that could make you psycologically (spelling?) accept you are what you preach, but you don't seem to be, though most women probably thing they are when most aren't. Women...
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